Would you date a transexual?

[Enros]

It's estimated that about 0.2-0.3% of the USA's population is transexual. The average American has about a 1 in 400 being transexual.

If you found out that the person you were interested in was a transexual, would you care?

I don't know why anyone would care. If they are so good you have to be told they are transexual, I don't see what the problem is. If your relationship is short-term, it doesn't matter. If it's long term, surrogacy is a possibility for having children.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

I think we can all agree that anyone who specifically seeks out transexuals for dating is probably a creep.

[Diocle]

C'mon it's almost impossible you don't understand if the man/woman you are interested in actually is a transexual!

[Phier]

It's estimated that about 0.2-0.3% of the USA's population is transexual. The average American has about a 1 in 400 being transexual.

If you found out that the person you were interested in was a transexual, would you care?

I don't know why anyone would care. If they are so good you have to be told they are transexual, I don't see what the problem is. If your relationship is short-term, it doesn't matter. If it's long term, surrogacy is a possibility for having children.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

I think we can all agree that anyone who specifically seeks out transexuals for dating is probably a creep.

For some reason I've found this to be the "homophobia" de jour type of thing. Now that being gay is "ok" main stream, gotta go to the next level. And yes it would matter to me. Sex is a mental thing as much as a physical one. If it was just physical, I'd be gay, I'd get a LOT more sex.

I should add your pole wording is biased "I have a problem with transsexuals" is a judgement of me. I have the problem. I don't have a problem with transsexuals, nor do I wish I found them sexually attractive. I do not have a problem with transsexuals but I would not date one, or even have meaningless sex with one, knowingly.

Being a transexual would just be a deal breaking turn off for me, but then again so is being fat to me. I don't see it as a flaw in myself that I don't care for fat women any more a flaw in myself that I don't want to date a transsexual.

[Hobbes]

Now that being gay is "ok" main stream, gotta go to the next level

The next level is actually pedophilia, this is what my pastor told me and he's an expert on the subject.

[Inhuman One]

I agree that the answers are poorly described.

Personly I dont want to date transsexuals and dont wish I would be able to, but I have nothing against them either. I just dont want to date them just like how I am fine with gay men but would not date them.

I only feel attraction to women, simple as that.

[PointOfViewGun]

I have as much problem with homosexuals as I have with a man not being what I consider a good looking woman...

[Enros]

C'mon it's almost impossible you don't understand if the man/woman you are interested in actually is a transexual!

The premise here is that their sex change was so well done it is impossible to tell, you are attracted to them, and suddenly you find out they are a transexual. This is a realistic assumption with modern medicine, there are many transexuals like that

For some reason I've found this to be the "homophobia" de jour type of thing. Now that being gay is "ok" main stream, gotta go to the next level. And yes it would matter to me. Sex is a mental thing as much as a physical one. If it was just physical, I'd be gay, I'd get a LOT more sex.

I should add your pole wording is biased "I have a problem with transsexuals" is a judgement of me. I have the problem. I don't have a problem with transsexuals, nor do I wish I found them sexually attractive. I do not have a problem with transsexuals but I would not date one, or even have meaningless sex with one, knowingly.

Being a transexual would just be a deal breaking turn off for me, but then again so is being fat to me. I don't see it as a flaw in myself that I don't care for fat women any more a flaw in myself that I don't want to date a transsexual.

"Being a transexual would just be a deal breaking turn off for me" - it was for me for all of my life up until just now when I decided it was homophobic to care if someone was transexual.

I am judging people who disagree with me. I think they imply transexuals aren't "really" part of their gender.

I think some reasons for not dating transexuals are fine. I don't think "I thought she was a smokeshow until I learned the awful truth" is a good reason.

The next level is actually pedophilia, this is what my pastor told me and he's an expert on the subject.

Funnily enough you are correct. Only 40% of child molestors are pedophiles. There are lots of pedophiles who don't rape children. We should give them counselling, psychiatric help and also study them. So long as they don't rape children, I don't have a problem with them.

I only feel attraction to women, simple as that.

I have as much problem with homosexuals as I have with a man not being what I consider a good looking woman...

And there's a chance one of those women you are attracted to could turn out to be a transexual.

Why would your mind suddenly change?

[clone]

And there's a chance one of those women you are attracted to could turn out to be a transexual.

Why would your mind suddenly change?

because she is not a natural woman.i would never date a woman no matter how pretty she is if her previous name was bob

[Hobbes]

What previous names would be acceptable to you, clone?

[Phier]

I don't think "I thought she was a smokeshow until I learned the awful truth" is a good reason.

Still nope. I see transexuals as the sex they were born with, not the sex they feel they should be born with. To me its not a woman but a pretty man who cut off his penis (this might be a tuck, dunno, I'm assuming you are talking post surgical.)

I don't see this as transphobic.

Edit: I think this is a more interesting question if you take this to some future where instead of faking a mostly non-functional vagina, a sex change procedure actually DID change the sex (see the book Steel Beach for some good writing on this, highly recommend the book). In that case where gender changed totally and fluidly (the main character of the book was male, who was originally female and then later switches back to female, and this really had nothing to do with the books plot), I have to say I don't know how I'd react. My guess would be, it would depend on if I knew them first as male or not.

[Himster]

If you can't tell it doesn't matter.
Like Theseus' Ship or Locke's Socks, or more specifically Aristotle's notion of "Final Cause".

[Hobbes]

@Phier: So in other words you would not shag a trans person because their past as males freaks you out?

[Phier]

@Phier: So in other words you would not shag a trans person because their past as males freaks you out?

Always the language. You could say "doesn't turn me on" instead.

[PointOfViewGun]

And there's a chance one of those women you are attracted to could turn out to be a transexual.

Why would your mind suddenly change?

Because they're not woman? I thought I covered that.

[chriscase]

I always find these threads very broad in their categorizations. There might be a transsexual I would date. There might be any number of people with some characteristic or another I would have sex with. There are most definitely a significant number of people in each of those categories I would not have sex with.

As for the scenario where a particular individual who I hypothetically wanted to have sex with turned out to be a transsexual, I haven't experienced it, so I don't know, but I think it's very likely it would depend on the individual. I don't really decide things like this by working from some abstract principle. Either I would still want to have sex with that particular person or I wouldn't. Who can tell before the situation arises?

[kesa82]

All of this seems to assume a person has some sort of obligation to deliver themselves up freely to their Inquisitor.

You're not an Inquisitor ? You wouldn't use the gift of a confidence as a weapon against the giver?

Then there's no problem to begin with, and subsequently no such question, subsequently no such thread.

I can't get beyond that.

[sumskilz]

...but then again so is being fat to me. I don't see it as a flaw in myself that I don't care for fat women...

No, it's not enough to treat them with basic human respect, you must proclaim your attraction to fat women or else you are a fat shamer.

This is a realistic assumption with modern medicine, there are many transexuals like that

I assume that there is one area of their bodies, which is particularly relevant to sex, where that is not the case.

"Being a transexual would just be a deal breaking turn off for me" - it was for me for all of my life up until just now when I decided it was homophobic to care if someone was transexual.

I am judging people who disagree with me. I think they imply transexuals aren't "really" part of their gender.

They really aren't. You can say gender is a social construct, but then the idea that gender is a social construct is also a social construct, not one that has particularly caught on, hence my statement that they aren't (yet?). There is no objective reality in any of that one way or another. The only objective reality is biological sex.

The intellectual discussion however is irrelevant since attraction is non-rational. We can rationally uncover the biological reasons behind certain attraction, but the basic mechanisms for it are largely emotional and subconscious. Social conditioning may be brought up, but unless you're going to argue that social conditioning can also make a gay person straight, then it seems logically inconsistent.

Always the language. You could say "doesn't turn me on" instead.

No, you must proclaim you are turned on by amputated male genitals or else you are a bigot.

[Mega Tortas de Bodemloze]

The powers of personality and attraction can over come most of the hurdles. If your "into them" when the lights go out it's what you feel, not what you see.
If they can make that work, then more power to them.

[Enros]

I assume that there is one area of their bodies, which is particularly relevant to sex, where that is not the case.

I thought they could do that up pretty good?

The intellectual discussion however is irrelevant since attraction is non-rational. We can rationally uncover the biological reasons behind certain attraction, but the basic mechanisms for it are largely emotional and subconscious. Social conditioning may be brought up, but unless you're going to argue that social conditioning can also make a gay person straight, then it seems logically inconsistent.

There are lots of attractions people have that I think are entirely made up and not one the same level as sexual orientation.

Attraction to one race or another for example. Maybe they have intellectually decided they want to date members of their own race. However they shouldn't lie and claim they don't occasionally find people from other races attractive, because I know they do. People also have much more success at changing their idea about dating other races than they do changing their sexual orientation.

Not being attracted to fat women is also a lie. Maybe the average woman I am attracted to is good looking. Some women I am attracted to are not good looking, some are underweight, some are overweight. Maybe they made up for it with confidence, maybe they know how to do their make up really well or whatever. I am also not attracted to some women I know who are generally regarded as very good looking. I can appreciate that, but for whatever reason it has't done anything for me. There seems to be a stigma against admitting this.

The people who say they aren't attracted to transexuals have admitted they are attracted to them before they find out they are transexuals. They're just intellectually deciding they wish they weren't attacted.

[sumskilz]

I thought they could do that up pretty good?

My attempt to investigate that question left me nauseous.

There are lots of attractions people have that I think are entirely made up and not one the same level as sexual orientation.

Attraction to one race or another for example. Maybe they have intellectually decided they want to date members of their own race. However they shouldn't lie and claim they don't occasionally find people from other races attractive, because I know they do. People also have much more success at changing their idea about dating other races than they do changing their sexual orientation.

Not being attracted to fat women is also a lie. Maybe the average woman I am attracted to is good looking. Some women I am attracted to are not good looking, some are underweight, some are overweight. Maybe they made up for it with confidence, maybe they know how to do their make up really well or whatever. I am also not attracted to some women I know who are generally regarded as very good looking. I can appreciate that, but for whatever reason it has't done anything for me. There seems to be a stigma against admitting this.

I don't really get why you think your subjective feelings are universal.

To me personally, healthy weight women and slightly overweight women can be attractive. Fat women and underweight women I don't find attractive at all. Therefore by your logic, you are lying about being attracted to underweight women.

The people who say they aren't attracted to transexuals have admitted they are attracted to them before they find out they are transexuals. They're just intellectually deciding they wish they weren't attacted.

Nothing has ever changed your level of attraction to someone after you found it out? To me, there are a small number of male to female transexuals who look like attractive women (or appear so on the internet anyway), though they either have a penis or something I find even less appealing. To each there own, I'm just not at all into either, and I don't see any reason why I would want to be.